Very perceptive. I have a grandson who is autistic and is lucky to have parents who recognize this and accept him as he is while working with him to help develop social skills. He is not shy per se, he just ignores people and social cues. Dickinson did not have such parents. My husband was shy and could not literally stand to be in crowds. It agitated him. This reaction along with Dickinson’s own wrestling with spirituality within a judgmental Calvinist tradition may dovetail with her dislike of attending church. Based on my own experience I would also not rule out depression. The poem which begins this essay resonates deeply with me. It is of course far superior, but its theme is the same as poems I wrote about my depressions.
Social interactions can be difficult for my son Jake. Especially at parties or family gatherings where people (cousins, aunts, uncles, etc) seem to know him, but he doesn't know who they are. Until he stopped going to them, these kinds of situations often resulted in him having a seizure — necessitating a ride in an ambulance, an emergency room stay, etc. He likes people and is perfectly fine in one-on-one situations, but he has learned to limit his exposure to social stimuli. When he says that dealing with too many people at once is painful for him, he means it literally.
love this. i really dislike it when people dig to find a reason for someone being the way they are, no matter what the trait.
i had a psychologist say that to me (after i'd been out about 10-12 years) — that she figured out the reason i "decided" my gender. good f-ing gods i was so pissed off, and told her off about it. i think she took it to heart as did some other members of the group.
humans are more widely varied and strange than we believe. just love them all
Very perceptive. I have a grandson who is autistic and is lucky to have parents who recognize this and accept him as he is while working with him to help develop social skills. He is not shy per se, he just ignores people and social cues. Dickinson did not have such parents. My husband was shy and could not literally stand to be in crowds. It agitated him. This reaction along with Dickinson’s own wrestling with spirituality within a judgmental Calvinist tradition may dovetail with her dislike of attending church. Based on my own experience I would also not rule out depression. The poem which begins this essay resonates deeply with me. It is of course far superior, but its theme is the same as poems I wrote about my depressions.
Social interactions can be difficult for my son Jake. Especially at parties or family gatherings where people (cousins, aunts, uncles, etc) seem to know him, but he doesn't know who they are. Until he stopped going to them, these kinds of situations often resulted in him having a seizure — necessitating a ride in an ambulance, an emergency room stay, etc. He likes people and is perfectly fine in one-on-one situations, but he has learned to limit his exposure to social stimuli. When he says that dealing with too many people at once is painful for him, he means it literally.
love this. i really dislike it when people dig to find a reason for someone being the way they are, no matter what the trait.
i had a psychologist say that to me (after i'd been out about 10-12 years) — that she figured out the reason i "decided" my gender. good f-ing gods i was so pissed off, and told her off about it. i think she took it to heart as did some other members of the group.
humans are more widely varied and strange than we believe. just love them all
Compelling and wonderfully insightful as always, Noah. Thanks :)
I’m reminded of a thought I had when teaching Dickinson and Kafka in spring 2020: https://111-words.ghost.io/dickinson-and-kafka/